If My Nozzle Volume 21: If My Nozzle Were Owned By Starbucks

There's a time and place for grasping at straws.

That Thing We Did! (that exclamation always bothered me)

As those of you who've scrolled down and read the right side of this page know, I'm in a band. We're called Goodness Gracious, named in honor of our gracious-to-a-fault friend. We just finished our debut album, Pam Says, named for our observant-to-a-fault friend. 

You can enjoy it in its entirety for free thanks to the whachamacallit (sp?) below. Give it a listen, it's my favorite thing I've ever worked on. Most of the songs are about babes.

Just When I Had Given Up On Love...

Hey guys. Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but I've been pretty busy. Case in point:

Special thanks to Emily Axford (hilarious), Kevin Hooper, and everyone else on the most excellent crew. More to come...

An Oldie But a Goodie Volume 2

A while back when I was still in college (and Jay Leno was hosting The Tonight Show, HELLO!) I taped a few episodes of a an online show where I reviewed student films. I just recovered the first episode and it made me chuckle so I put it on 'tube. Thanks to Alvin Liong for sending it over and to Oliver White for taking a ball bustin'. As the Mexican lady used to say at the cash register in the dining hall, "Enyoy!"

If My Nozzle Volume 20: If My Nozzle Was A Fine Garment

Can you take that in a little? Hehehe...

A New Low For CNN's Live Feed

It is worse than Swine Flu - I'll give 'em that.

I'm An Advertiser's Dream

Umm, sure. Why not?

It Was Her Time... For Like 30 Years

You can only play old ladies for so long before people start looking at their watches. However, she was a master of that art form - maybe the greatest professional old person since Walter Brennan...



I'm pretty sure he was 30 when this picture was taken. Some people just got it...

Anyway, here's to you, Bea Arthur. I'll lift a mug of warm milk to you. When you were young, you were wise beyond your years. When the years caught up to you, they fit like a glove. Heck, your face even looked kind of dead... May you stay forever old, wherever you are.

Whisper words or wisdom, Let it Bea.

Madonna To Adopt Cast Of Slumdog Millionaire

Handle Us With Care

A personal highlight from the last "We're Nice People Show." Remember: the audience doesn't have to like or understand a joke for it to be AMAZING.